French by Heart: an American family's adventures in La Belle France by Rebecca S. Ramsey.
"Can a family of five from deep in the heart of Dixie find happiness smack-dab in the middle of France? A charming tale with world-class characters, French by Heart reads like letters from your funniest friend. More than just a slice of life in France, it's a heartwarming account of a family coming of age and learning what 'home sweet home' really means."
Hopefully this sounds as interesting to you two as it does to me. :) Kelly - I've submitted an ILL request for a copy for you. I figure we can plan to discuss it sometime next month? There are discussion questions in back of my copy which I will post later.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Kelly's Turn
I know I finished this book before everyone else, but I've been slow to put things together. Overall, I really enjoyed this book. I liked all the different people's stories put together and I have to admit I never even thought about if it would work this way in real life. I'm an easy one with the willing suspension of disbelief! I'm glad I didn't buy the book, though, as it's not something I would read over and over again. But there were a lot of great descriptions and great thoughts scattered throughout the book! (I skipped a few of the questions - you guys covered them well already!)
1) When Claire first walks into Lillian’s, she reflects: “When was the last time she had been someplace where nobody knew who she was?” Is the anonymity of the kitchen a lure for Lillian’s students?
I remember how I was when I first went into a chat room online. They were still a fairly new thing, and it was wonderful for me. I didn't have any stereotypes - everyone could be a friend - and no one judged me either! I can see that being in a cooking class like this could be very freeing for a mom in Claire's situation. Love these quotes from Claire's story:
“The strangeness of it caught her. It was hard to remember the last time she had gone anywhere without her children or her husband. … How strange, she thought. These people here, they looked at her and thought she was alone, she whose children were with her even in her dreams.”
“After the children were born, it was as if no one could see further than the soft hair, the round cheeks of the babies she carried. She became the frame for the picture that was her son and daughter.”
2) How did you respond to the story of Lillian’s upbringing? Would Lillian have been better off with a more traditional home life, like those of her school friends? Do you agree with Abuelita’s statement that “sometimes our greatest gifts grow from what we’re not given”?
She didn't have it as bad as many children have it, though that doesn't make her situation "easy", by any means. I think we all have to do the best with what we're given, and I think Lillian did! I completely agree with Abuelita's statement!
3) Besides scenes from her childhood, the author discloses very little about Lillian. Why do you think she did this? How would the book be different if we knew more about Lillian’s day-to-day life?
I think the author was more interested in making sure all the "ingredients"/people of her book had time to shine, rather than focusing on the chef preparing the meal. Hope that's not too philosophical an answer! :o)
4) As a general rule, Lillian doesn’t give her students recipes. Why do you think she does this? What are the pros and cons of this approach to cooking?
I don't know why and it would drive me NUTS to cook this way!! I have to admit I don't see any pros!
5) Did Helen do the right thing by telling Carl about her affair? How would their marriage — and Helen and Carl themselves — have evolved had he never learned the truth?
I think honesty is always in order, so yes. If she hadn't shared with him, she might not have left the other guy, and she might have continued to grow more distant from Carl, learned to think less of him for not noticing what was going on. Here's my favorite quotes from their story:
“He sank into the warmth of his child’s fragile body against his shoulder, watched in awe that a baby, still essentially asleep, could keep a death grip on the blanket that meant the world was safe and loving, marveling at the thought that it was he and Helen who gave the feeling to the blanket, and the blanket to the child.”
“Statistics predicted a far greater chance of divorce than automobile accident, death by violence, or the all-too-graphic possibility of “dismemberment” – which was perhaps why insurance companies didn’t sell policies for marital stability.”
“Carl’s older sister didn’t understand (why he stayed with his wife after she had been unfaithful). … ‘How long can you live like this?’ she asked him. ‘We made a promise, a long time ago.’ … ‘She broke the promise, Carl.’ But her tone was gentle. ‘We are keeping as much of it as we can.’ … ‘Marriage is a leap of faith. You are each other’s safety net.’ ‘People change.’ Carl stopped, and let his fingers rest on the counter in front of him. ‘I think that’s what we’re both counting on.’”
7) Although we only see Charlie, Tom’s wife, in flashback, she seems to share Lillian’s love of essential ingredients. What do you make of Charlie’s statement that “We are all just ingredients. What matters is the grace with which you cook the meal”?
Back to the "we make the best we can with what we've got" thought.
“Look at what you did,’ Lillian remarked quietly, standing next to Tom at the counter. ‘They’ll eat it,’ he said, ‘and then it’ll be gone.’ ‘That’s what makes it a gift,’ Lillian replied.”
11) At the end of the novel, Lillian reflects that: “She saw how connected [the students’] lives had become and would remain. Where did a teacher fit in the picture, she wondered, when there was no longer a class?” What do you think happens to Lillian once her class is disbanded? What do you imagine happens in to the other characters’ lives after the book ends?
I like to think that Tom and Lillian get married someday when he's done grieving. I'm a romantic like that!
Last quotes:
“Isabelle had always thought of her mind as a garden, a magical place to play as a child, when the grown-ups were having conversations and she was expected to listen politely – and even, although she hated to admit this, later with Edward, her husband, when listening to the particularities of his carpet salesmanship wore her thin. Every year the garden grew larger, the paths longer and more complicated. Meadows of memories. Of course, her mental garden hadn’t always been well tended. There were the years when the children were young, fast-moving periods when life flew by without time for the roots of deep reflection, and yet she knew memories were created whether one pondered them or not. She had always considered that one of the luxuries of growing older would be the chance to wander through the garden that had grown while she wasn’t looking. She would sit on a bench and let her mind take every path, tend every moment she hadn’t paid attention to, appreciate the juxtaposition of one memory against another. But now that she was older and had time, she found more often than not that she was lost – words, names, her children’s phone numbers arriving and departing from her mind like trains without schedules.”
“I’ve been wondering,’ Isabelle commented reflectively over dessert, ‘if it is foolish to make new memories when you know you are going to lose them.’ … After a while, she spoke again, ‘You know, I am starting to think that maybe memories are like this dessert. I eat it, and it becomes a part of me, whether I remember it later or not.”
“I knew a sculptor,’ Isabelle said, nodding. ‘He always said that if you looked hard enough, you could see where each person carried his soul in his body. It sounds crazy, but when you saw his sculptures, it made sense. I think the same is true with those we love. Our bodies carry the memories of them, in our muscles, in our skin, in our bones. My children are right here.’ She pointed to the inside curve of her elbow. ‘Where I held them when they were babies. Even if there comes a time when I don’t know who they are anymore, I believe I will feel them here.”
1) When Claire first walks into Lillian’s, she reflects: “When was the last time she had been someplace where nobody knew who she was?” Is the anonymity of the kitchen a lure for Lillian’s students?
I remember how I was when I first went into a chat room online. They were still a fairly new thing, and it was wonderful for me. I didn't have any stereotypes - everyone could be a friend - and no one judged me either! I can see that being in a cooking class like this could be very freeing for a mom in Claire's situation. Love these quotes from Claire's story:
“The strangeness of it caught her. It was hard to remember the last time she had gone anywhere without her children or her husband. … How strange, she thought. These people here, they looked at her and thought she was alone, she whose children were with her even in her dreams.”
“After the children were born, it was as if no one could see further than the soft hair, the round cheeks of the babies she carried. She became the frame for the picture that was her son and daughter.”
2) How did you respond to the story of Lillian’s upbringing? Would Lillian have been better off with a more traditional home life, like those of her school friends? Do you agree with Abuelita’s statement that “sometimes our greatest gifts grow from what we’re not given”?
She didn't have it as bad as many children have it, though that doesn't make her situation "easy", by any means. I think we all have to do the best with what we're given, and I think Lillian did! I completely agree with Abuelita's statement!
3) Besides scenes from her childhood, the author discloses very little about Lillian. Why do you think she did this? How would the book be different if we knew more about Lillian’s day-to-day life?
I think the author was more interested in making sure all the "ingredients"/people of her book had time to shine, rather than focusing on the chef preparing the meal. Hope that's not too philosophical an answer! :o)
4) As a general rule, Lillian doesn’t give her students recipes. Why do you think she does this? What are the pros and cons of this approach to cooking?
I don't know why and it would drive me NUTS to cook this way!! I have to admit I don't see any pros!
5) Did Helen do the right thing by telling Carl about her affair? How would their marriage — and Helen and Carl themselves — have evolved had he never learned the truth?
I think honesty is always in order, so yes. If she hadn't shared with him, she might not have left the other guy, and she might have continued to grow more distant from Carl, learned to think less of him for not noticing what was going on. Here's my favorite quotes from their story:
“He sank into the warmth of his child’s fragile body against his shoulder, watched in awe that a baby, still essentially asleep, could keep a death grip on the blanket that meant the world was safe and loving, marveling at the thought that it was he and Helen who gave the feeling to the blanket, and the blanket to the child.”
“Statistics predicted a far greater chance of divorce than automobile accident, death by violence, or the all-too-graphic possibility of “dismemberment” – which was perhaps why insurance companies didn’t sell policies for marital stability.”
“Carl’s older sister didn’t understand (why he stayed with his wife after she had been unfaithful). … ‘How long can you live like this?’ she asked him. ‘We made a promise, a long time ago.’ … ‘She broke the promise, Carl.’ But her tone was gentle. ‘We are keeping as much of it as we can.’ … ‘Marriage is a leap of faith. You are each other’s safety net.’ ‘People change.’ Carl stopped, and let his fingers rest on the counter in front of him. ‘I think that’s what we’re both counting on.’”
7) Although we only see Charlie, Tom’s wife, in flashback, she seems to share Lillian’s love of essential ingredients. What do you make of Charlie’s statement that “We are all just ingredients. What matters is the grace with which you cook the meal”?
Back to the "we make the best we can with what we've got" thought.
“Look at what you did,’ Lillian remarked quietly, standing next to Tom at the counter. ‘They’ll eat it,’ he said, ‘and then it’ll be gone.’ ‘That’s what makes it a gift,’ Lillian replied.”
11) At the end of the novel, Lillian reflects that: “She saw how connected [the students’] lives had become and would remain. Where did a teacher fit in the picture, she wondered, when there was no longer a class?” What do you think happens to Lillian once her class is disbanded? What do you imagine happens in to the other characters’ lives after the book ends?
I like to think that Tom and Lillian get married someday when he's done grieving. I'm a romantic like that!
Last quotes:
“Isabelle had always thought of her mind as a garden, a magical place to play as a child, when the grown-ups were having conversations and she was expected to listen politely – and even, although she hated to admit this, later with Edward, her husband, when listening to the particularities of his carpet salesmanship wore her thin. Every year the garden grew larger, the paths longer and more complicated. Meadows of memories. Of course, her mental garden hadn’t always been well tended. There were the years when the children were young, fast-moving periods when life flew by without time for the roots of deep reflection, and yet she knew memories were created whether one pondered them or not. She had always considered that one of the luxuries of growing older would be the chance to wander through the garden that had grown while she wasn’t looking. She would sit on a bench and let her mind take every path, tend every moment she hadn’t paid attention to, appreciate the juxtaposition of one memory against another. But now that she was older and had time, she found more often than not that she was lost – words, names, her children’s phone numbers arriving and departing from her mind like trains without schedules.”
“I’ve been wondering,’ Isabelle commented reflectively over dessert, ‘if it is foolish to make new memories when you know you are going to lose them.’ … After a while, she spoke again, ‘You know, I am starting to think that maybe memories are like this dessert. I eat it, and it becomes a part of me, whether I remember it later or not.”
“I knew a sculptor,’ Isabelle said, nodding. ‘He always said that if you looked hard enough, you could see where each person carried his soul in his body. It sounds crazy, but when you saw his sculptures, it made sense. I think the same is true with those we love. Our bodies carry the memories of them, in our muscles, in our skin, in our bones. My children are right here.’ She pointed to the inside curve of her elbow. ‘Where I held them when they were babies. Even if there comes a time when I don’t know who they are anymore, I believe I will feel them here.”
Monday, May 4, 2009
Keri's thoughts
I definitely enjoyed this book, but I can't say that I loved this book. I always like books which switch perspectives so that you can get a different idea of things and hear each characters stories. I got confused about a couple of the characters though, particularly Isabelle and Antonia. I love books about food as well, so that element in this book appealed to me as well. I wish that there had been actual recipes included though.
1) When Claire first walks into Lillian’s, she reflects: “When was the last time she had been someplace where nobody knew who she was?” Is the anonymity of the kitchen a lure for Lillian’s students?
I liked that quote from Claire as I think it is something we've all felt at one moment or another. When you are surrounded by people who know nothing about you, it can be a little scary as well as a bit freeing. They don't know all your stories, or how you normally act and that can be in turns a wonderful opportunity to be someone new, or can give you a sense of intense loneliness and a desire to keep yourself for those who already know you. I'm not sure that I felt that the anonymity was a lure, mostly just a side note to their experience.
2) How did you respond to the story of Lillian’s upbringing? Would Lillian have been better off with a more traditional home life, like those of her school friends? Do you agree with Abuelita’s statement that “sometimes our greatest gifts grow from what we’re not given”?
I felt sadness for Lillian and her mother. I could understand the desire to lose oneself in books, and though it wasn't the "best" upbringing for Lillian it taught her to survive on her own and teach herself in a way that she never would have had her mother not been so depressed. I do believe that sometimes our greatest joys can stem from what we achieve instead of what we receive and Lillian seems to have created a happy future for herself in spite of the loneliness of her childhood.
3) Besides scenes from her childhood, the author discloses very little about Lillian. Why do you think she did this? How would the book be different if we knew more about Lillian’s day-to-day life?
I think that the point of the novel was not that Lillian was the main character...she was simply a piece of the puzzle of this particular cooking class. We learned bits about her as we learned bits about each other member...but it was never meant to be a full story for anyone. I think it is about how our experiences reflect on those we come into contact with - creating moments of shared joy or sadness and cause us to reflect on how our past brought us to that moment and where we can move on from there.
4) As a general rule, Lillian doesn’t give her students recipes. Why do you think she does this? What are the pros and cons of this approach to cooking?
I think that the reason she doesn't give recipes is because she sees food as something very personal to each person. Thus each person will add or subtract the ingredients or amounts that appeal or don't appeal to them in the moment that they create the food. The benefit of cooking is that you can have this freedom to add a pinch of this, or a dash of that, switch out this ingredient for another that you like better and taste and see how it turns out. This freedom can be a wonderful gift...but on the other hand it can be a total frustration for others. Some people want and need the structure and comfort of a set recipe which turns out time and time again exactly the way one wants or needs it. I personally like a little bit of both...I love recipes, but I feel free to play with it to suit me in that moment.
5) Did Helen do the right thing by telling Carl about her affair? How would their marriage — and Helen and Carl themselves — have evolved had he never learned the truth?
In their case, I think that Helen made the right choice in telling Carl about her affair. They were able to move on and improve their relationship due to her honesty and how they got through it. However, I don't believe it is always the right choice to make, as Aunt Annette said. Sometimes it is better to keep it to yourself, deal with the guilt and move on without unnecessarily hurting the other person in order to make yourself feel better by "sharing" the guilt and hurt. But for them, they seemed to need the shaking up that her admission of the affair provided and it ultimately made their marriage stronger.
6) Each of the character’s stories centers on a dish or ingredient which has a profound affect upon how they see themselves or the world. What connections do you see between Claire and the crabs? Between Chloe and tortillas? Tom and the pasta sauce?
I just browsed through those chapters and really am not sure what to write as an answer...so I guess I have nothing to say for this one. :)
7) Although we only see Charlie, Tom’s wife, in flashback, she seems to share Lillian’s love of essential ingredients. What do you make of Charlie’s statement that “We are all just ingredients. What matters is the grace with which you cook the meal”?
We all add something when we cook for others. Our joy, hospitality, even a little bit of how we see the world. We chose specific dishes that have meaning for us even if the only meaning is that we really love how it tastes. And I think that our love for something, or the someone that we cook for, will come through in the meal we present.
8) Chloe observes that Thanksgiving at her house is “about everyone being the same and if you’re not, eating enough so you won’t notice.” Is this something that our culture buys into in a larger sense? How does Lillian’s approach to food fly in the face of this idea?
I have to mention that even though I love Christmas, I think that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I don't love the foods, though I've come to appreciate them and enjoy what I do eat that one day of the year. But what I do love it that for our family at least it is a celebration of togetherness. We include immediate family, extended family, family friends, friends, strangers...anyone is welcomed and treated like a member of the family. We share in the preparations - though some contribute a greater portion, everyone brings something to the table. We share our prayers, our food, our laughter, even tears with each other...and then we also share in the clean up. I think that what our family does seems to capture a bit of what Lillian believed about food...but I know that it isn't necessarily how our culture behaves.
9) Isaac says to Isabelle that he thinks “we are each a ladder and a chair for the other.” What do you think he means? Are there people in your life who are or have been that for you?
I suppose that he meant that they were a support for each other in times of movement and in times of quiet? If this is what he means, then I have definitely had a variety of people who have been that for me over the years. Sometimes it is for only a short time, like my friend Megan on our two summer mission trips. I don't think either of us would have coped as well without each other there for support, love and encouragement...but we aren't close friends now. I think that God brings people into our lives all the time just exactly when we need them or when they need us...we just have to be open to the connection.
10) Lillian tells the class that “A holiday is a lot like a kitchen. What’s important is what comes out of it.” In what way do the kitchens in this book — Lillian’s childhood kitchen, the greasy spoon where Tom meets Charlie, the kitchen that Antonia saves from demolition — represent different celebrations of life? Is there a kitchen in your life that you associate with a particular celebration or emotional milestone?
I love kitchens and I think that they can be a very important part of a family life. My childhood memories of the kitchen include helping my Dad work in the kitchen at Fosters Freeze, "washing" dishes and licking the beaters, and learning to cook as I grew older and making fancy meals for my parents for their anniversary. Now my kitchen is one of my favorite rooms and a place that I want to be accessible for my guests and a place that they can feel at home.
11) At the end of the novel, Lillian reflects that: “She saw how connected [the students’] lives had become and would remain. Where did a teacher fit in the picture, she wondered, when there was no longer a class?” What do you think happens to Lillian once her class is disbanded? What do you imagine happens in to the other characters’ lives after the book ends?
I think that a memorable class with a memorable teacher is never forgotten and depending on how strong the connection is the students would try to maintain contact. I know that I have several teachers that are still part of my life even though many years have past since I was a part of their classrooms. I don't really think too much about what happened to the characters now...but I suppose that I assume that they are happy and sharing the things they learned with the other people in their lives.
12) What would be your essential ingredients?
If we are talking about actual ingredients I would probably say either lemon or garlic as both are something I use a lot and love the flavor of in many things. But otherwise, I would say that my essential ingredient is love. I feel so blessed by so much love in my life and can't imagine what I would be like if I didn't have this wonderful cocoon of love surrounding me as far back as I can remember. I know that not everyone feels this and that just makes me grateful and thank God once again that I somehow was blessed.
Some favorite quotes:
1) When Claire first walks into Lillian’s, she reflects: “When was the last time she had been someplace where nobody knew who she was?” Is the anonymity of the kitchen a lure for Lillian’s students?
I liked that quote from Claire as I think it is something we've all felt at one moment or another. When you are surrounded by people who know nothing about you, it can be a little scary as well as a bit freeing. They don't know all your stories, or how you normally act and that can be in turns a wonderful opportunity to be someone new, or can give you a sense of intense loneliness and a desire to keep yourself for those who already know you. I'm not sure that I felt that the anonymity was a lure, mostly just a side note to their experience.
2) How did you respond to the story of Lillian’s upbringing? Would Lillian have been better off with a more traditional home life, like those of her school friends? Do you agree with Abuelita’s statement that “sometimes our greatest gifts grow from what we’re not given”?
I felt sadness for Lillian and her mother. I could understand the desire to lose oneself in books, and though it wasn't the "best" upbringing for Lillian it taught her to survive on her own and teach herself in a way that she never would have had her mother not been so depressed. I do believe that sometimes our greatest joys can stem from what we achieve instead of what we receive and Lillian seems to have created a happy future for herself in spite of the loneliness of her childhood.
3) Besides scenes from her childhood, the author discloses very little about Lillian. Why do you think she did this? How would the book be different if we knew more about Lillian’s day-to-day life?
I think that the point of the novel was not that Lillian was the main character...she was simply a piece of the puzzle of this particular cooking class. We learned bits about her as we learned bits about each other member...but it was never meant to be a full story for anyone. I think it is about how our experiences reflect on those we come into contact with - creating moments of shared joy or sadness and cause us to reflect on how our past brought us to that moment and where we can move on from there.
4) As a general rule, Lillian doesn’t give her students recipes. Why do you think she does this? What are the pros and cons of this approach to cooking?
I think that the reason she doesn't give recipes is because she sees food as something very personal to each person. Thus each person will add or subtract the ingredients or amounts that appeal or don't appeal to them in the moment that they create the food. The benefit of cooking is that you can have this freedom to add a pinch of this, or a dash of that, switch out this ingredient for another that you like better and taste and see how it turns out. This freedom can be a wonderful gift...but on the other hand it can be a total frustration for others. Some people want and need the structure and comfort of a set recipe which turns out time and time again exactly the way one wants or needs it. I personally like a little bit of both...I love recipes, but I feel free to play with it to suit me in that moment.
5) Did Helen do the right thing by telling Carl about her affair? How would their marriage — and Helen and Carl themselves — have evolved had he never learned the truth?
In their case, I think that Helen made the right choice in telling Carl about her affair. They were able to move on and improve their relationship due to her honesty and how they got through it. However, I don't believe it is always the right choice to make, as Aunt Annette said. Sometimes it is better to keep it to yourself, deal with the guilt and move on without unnecessarily hurting the other person in order to make yourself feel better by "sharing" the guilt and hurt. But for them, they seemed to need the shaking up that her admission of the affair provided and it ultimately made their marriage stronger.
6) Each of the character’s stories centers on a dish or ingredient which has a profound affect upon how they see themselves or the world. What connections do you see between Claire and the crabs? Between Chloe and tortillas? Tom and the pasta sauce?
I just browsed through those chapters and really am not sure what to write as an answer...so I guess I have nothing to say for this one. :)
7) Although we only see Charlie, Tom’s wife, in flashback, she seems to share Lillian’s love of essential ingredients. What do you make of Charlie’s statement that “We are all just ingredients. What matters is the grace with which you cook the meal”?
We all add something when we cook for others. Our joy, hospitality, even a little bit of how we see the world. We chose specific dishes that have meaning for us even if the only meaning is that we really love how it tastes. And I think that our love for something, or the someone that we cook for, will come through in the meal we present.
8) Chloe observes that Thanksgiving at her house is “about everyone being the same and if you’re not, eating enough so you won’t notice.” Is this something that our culture buys into in a larger sense? How does Lillian’s approach to food fly in the face of this idea?
I have to mention that even though I love Christmas, I think that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I don't love the foods, though I've come to appreciate them and enjoy what I do eat that one day of the year. But what I do love it that for our family at least it is a celebration of togetherness. We include immediate family, extended family, family friends, friends, strangers...anyone is welcomed and treated like a member of the family. We share in the preparations - though some contribute a greater portion, everyone brings something to the table. We share our prayers, our food, our laughter, even tears with each other...and then we also share in the clean up. I think that what our family does seems to capture a bit of what Lillian believed about food...but I know that it isn't necessarily how our culture behaves.
9) Isaac says to Isabelle that he thinks “we are each a ladder and a chair for the other.” What do you think he means? Are there people in your life who are or have been that for you?
I suppose that he meant that they were a support for each other in times of movement and in times of quiet? If this is what he means, then I have definitely had a variety of people who have been that for me over the years. Sometimes it is for only a short time, like my friend Megan on our two summer mission trips. I don't think either of us would have coped as well without each other there for support, love and encouragement...but we aren't close friends now. I think that God brings people into our lives all the time just exactly when we need them or when they need us...we just have to be open to the connection.
10) Lillian tells the class that “A holiday is a lot like a kitchen. What’s important is what comes out of it.” In what way do the kitchens in this book — Lillian’s childhood kitchen, the greasy spoon where Tom meets Charlie, the kitchen that Antonia saves from demolition — represent different celebrations of life? Is there a kitchen in your life that you associate with a particular celebration or emotional milestone?
I love kitchens and I think that they can be a very important part of a family life. My childhood memories of the kitchen include helping my Dad work in the kitchen at Fosters Freeze, "washing" dishes and licking the beaters, and learning to cook as I grew older and making fancy meals for my parents for their anniversary. Now my kitchen is one of my favorite rooms and a place that I want to be accessible for my guests and a place that they can feel at home.
11) At the end of the novel, Lillian reflects that: “She saw how connected [the students’] lives had become and would remain. Where did a teacher fit in the picture, she wondered, when there was no longer a class?” What do you think happens to Lillian once her class is disbanded? What do you imagine happens in to the other characters’ lives after the book ends?
I think that a memorable class with a memorable teacher is never forgotten and depending on how strong the connection is the students would try to maintain contact. I know that I have several teachers that are still part of my life even though many years have past since I was a part of their classrooms. I don't really think too much about what happened to the characters now...but I suppose that I assume that they are happy and sharing the things they learned with the other people in their lives.
12) What would be your essential ingredients?
If we are talking about actual ingredients I would probably say either lemon or garlic as both are something I use a lot and love the flavor of in many things. But otherwise, I would say that my essential ingredient is love. I feel so blessed by so much love in my life and can't imagine what I would be like if I didn't have this wonderful cocoon of love surrounding me as far back as I can remember. I know that not everyone feels this and that just makes me grateful and thank God once again that I somehow was blessed.
Some favorite quotes:
- "(Lillian) felt about her zester the way some women do about a pair of spiky red shoes - a frivolous splurge, good only for parties, bu oh so lovely...There were so few occasions for a zester, using it felt like a holiday."
- "(Claire) I remember my wedding cake...I was so hungry...Here was this incredible cake...I told my husband I was starving, and he took a fork and just stuck it in the side of the cake and fed me a bite. My mother and the photographer were furious, but I always tell James that was the moment when I married him."
- "Flour is like the guy in the movie who you don't realize is sexy until the very end...Butter is so much more alluring. But the thing is, flour is what holds a cake together."
- "And slowly, as he waited for illumination, what had happened each day - began to pile up against what he could not imagine, until the secret she couldn't keep became one more part of their lives, one more stick in the nest they had built of moments and promises, the first time he had seen her, the second time they had fought, his hand touching her hair as she nursed a baby. Carl was a bird-watcherl; he knew that not all sticks in a nest are straight."
- "Life is beautiful. Some people just remind you of that more than others."
- "Isabelle had always thought of her mind as a gardern...Every year the garden grew larger, the paths longer and more complicated. Meadows of memories...she knew memories were created whether one pondered them or not. She had always considered that one of the luxuries of growing older would be the chance to wander through the garden that had grown while she wasn't looking. She would sit on a bench and let her mind take every path, tend every moment she hadn't paid attention to, appreciate the juxtaposition of one memory against another."
- "(Isabelle) When she realized that there are many kinds of love and not all of them are obvious, that some wait, like presents in the back of the closet, until you are able to open them."
- "I think it is good to not know things sometimes...It makes everything...a possibility, if you don't know the answer."
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Two Things
I believe it will Keri's choice next go around.
And, I just saw the trailer for the movie "My sister's Keeper". I can't wait until it comes out. I wonder how true to the book it will be.
And, I just saw the trailer for the movie "My sister's Keeper". I can't wait until it comes out. I wonder how true to the book it will be.
Annette's View
Thanks Keri for posting the questions. I'll get to them in a minute. But first I need to preface my discussion with the fact I didn't really like this book. I wanted to like the book. And there were moments when I like parts of the book. There were characters who I liked. but all in all, the book bugged me. I felt that it was unrealistic. I found the ability of the characters to bond in seconds to be unbelievable. And they were able to reach levels of intimacy that are rare to achieve over time much less with a touch at a cooking class. Some of the authors writing was quite beautiful but at times she was trying too hard and it was just one simile/metaphor after another. Too much of a good thing. There were times when I just said "oh, come on". One example..Helen eats a bite of chocolate and it brings back memories. That part isn't hard to believe...I've had times when the taste or smell of something has taken me back to a different time/place. But Helen has not one...not two...but FOUR really detailed and intense memories off that one bite of chocolate...boomboomboom. This was really stretching things for me.
And they had convesations I don't think most people would have within 4 seconds of meeting one another. There is one on page 51 where Helen asks Claire "What do you do that makes you happy, just you? I just can't imagine a perfect stranger asking that of someone within 1 minute of meeting them. On page 66, there is a discussion of how Carl and Helen first dance which is the beginning of their relationship. But at the end of the dance, he says "your home". I mean really...who would say that? to someone after their first dance?
I thought the description of food and preparing the food was much better and the strongest part of the book. I enjoyed that part.
Okay, now to the Q&A
1) When Claire first walks into Lillian’s, she reflects: “When was the last time she had been someplace where nobody knew who she was?” Is the anonymity of the kitchen a lure for Lillian’s students?
I don't think the anonymity of the kitchen is what brought them to cooking class. It may be why they feel comfortable there though. However, the author brings everyone so close in such a short period of time that I would harldy say that the place is very anonymous after a couple of weeks.
2) How did you respond to the story of Lillian’s upbringing? Would Lillian have been better off with a more traditional home life, like those of her school friends? Do you agree with Abuelita’s statement that “sometimes our greatest gifts grow from what we’re not given”?
hmmm. better off? I always find that kind of question both interesting and perturbing. I think you end up where you end up and some make more with what they are given than others. Maybe its true some make up for what they are NOT given than others.
i did find it way too hard to believe that mashed potatos and mexican hot chocolate ahd the power to bring her mother out of such a profound depression. I think this is taking a metaphor way too far afield. Her mother was profoundly dysfunctional, I don't think you just wake up one day and say hmmm....hot chocolate...life beings again!
3) Besides scenes from her childhood, the author discloses very little about Lillian. Why do you think she did this? How would the book be different if we knew more about Lillian’s day-to-day life?
I really don't know, except that Lillian is kind of like the "magic fairy godmother" in the book...the mysterious seer....the waver of magic wand (in this case the magic spoon). the book really centers on how the author sees the participants in the cooking class growing and changing, not how Lillian grows and changes.
4) As a general rule, Lillian doesn’t give her students recipes. Why do you think she does this? What are the pros and cons of this approach to cooking?
hmmm. when you are comfortable cooking without a recipe, I believe you are less afraid of cooking and perhaps more creative. perhaps the food reflects you more than others. however, i find it a bizarre way to teach newbies. I always start with a known recipe and then create from there, deviate however I feel comfortable. I think the author was more interested in making a point than describing how most cooking classes are taught. I've taken many, never had one without a recipe.
5) Did Helen do the right thing by telling Carl about her affair? How would their marriage — and Helen and Carl themselves — have evolved had he never learned the truth?
I don't think she should have told him. It hurt him without changing anything. She was staying with Carl and loved him. She would have to learn how to live with the memories of the lover and say goodbye to all that. She had to do that her own way anyhow. I think it would have been easier if he hadn't known.
6) Each of the character’s stories centers on a dish or ingredient which has a profound affect upon how they see themselves or the world. What connections do you see between Claire and the crabs? Between Chloe and tortillas? Tom and the pasta sauce?
I hadn't really thought about that until now...but I guess I should have...they are the ultimate metaphors.
7) Although we only see Charlie, Tom’s wife, in flashback, she seems to share Lillian’s love of essential ingredients. What do you make of Charlie’s statement that “We are all just ingredients. What matters is the grace with which you cook the meal”?
I'm not sure I get it frankly.
8) Chloe observes that Thanksgiving at her house is “about everyone being the same and if you’re not, eating enough so you won’t notice.” Is this something that our culture buys into in a larger sense? How does Lillian’s approach to food fly in the face of this idea?
One of the things that I did love about the book was how Lillian encourage everyone to slow down and savor flavors and ingredients. She tried to encourage them essentially that "more is not alway better". She attempted them to wakeup to the best tastes (like the ugly tomato). I thought this was a good message and always made me hungry.
9) Isaac says to Isabelle that he thinks “we are each a ladder and a chair for the other.” What do you think he means? Are there people in your life who are or have been that for you?
I forget in what context this was said...so I'm afraid I don't understand it and don't really want to make the effort to go figure it out.
0) Lillian tells the class that “A holiday is a lot like a kitchen. What’s important is what comes out of it.” In what way do the kitchens in this book — Lillian’s childhood kitchen, the greasy spoon where Tom meets Charlie, the kitchen that Antonia saves from demolition — represent different celebrations of life? Is there a kitchen in your life that you associate with a particular celebration or emotional milestone?
Not sure. And no.
11) At the end of the novel, Lillian reflects that: “She saw how connected [the students’] lives had become and would remain. Where did a teacher fit in the picture, she wondered, when there was no longer a class?” What do you think happens to Lillian once her class is disbanded? What do you imagine happens in to the other characters’ lives after the book ends?
Again..I think the extent to which the students "connected" and became intimate with one another is simply unrealistic and I have trouble extending those relationships into the future. To have had one or two connect in that way is possible. to have had it happen in a class that met for a long time, possibly. But again...this just didn't work for me. Lillian will move onto the next class...and in the authors world I'm sure she will weave the same "magic" onto the next class of people. I believe the author would like us to believe that everyone will live happily ever after since in the end I believe she wrote a fairy tale.
12) What would be your essential ingredients?
And they had convesations I don't think most people would have within 4 seconds of meeting one another. There is one on page 51 where Helen asks Claire "What do you do that makes you happy, just you? I just can't imagine a perfect stranger asking that of someone within 1 minute of meeting them. On page 66, there is a discussion of how Carl and Helen first dance which is the beginning of their relationship. But at the end of the dance, he says "your home". I mean really...who would say that? to someone after their first dance?
I thought the description of food and preparing the food was much better and the strongest part of the book. I enjoyed that part.
Okay, now to the Q&A
1) When Claire first walks into Lillian’s, she reflects: “When was the last time she had been someplace where nobody knew who she was?” Is the anonymity of the kitchen a lure for Lillian’s students?
I don't think the anonymity of the kitchen is what brought them to cooking class. It may be why they feel comfortable there though. However, the author brings everyone so close in such a short period of time that I would harldy say that the place is very anonymous after a couple of weeks.
2) How did you respond to the story of Lillian’s upbringing? Would Lillian have been better off with a more traditional home life, like those of her school friends? Do you agree with Abuelita’s statement that “sometimes our greatest gifts grow from what we’re not given”?
hmmm. better off? I always find that kind of question both interesting and perturbing. I think you end up where you end up and some make more with what they are given than others. Maybe its true some make up for what they are NOT given than others.
i did find it way too hard to believe that mashed potatos and mexican hot chocolate ahd the power to bring her mother out of such a profound depression. I think this is taking a metaphor way too far afield. Her mother was profoundly dysfunctional, I don't think you just wake up one day and say hmmm....hot chocolate...life beings again!
3) Besides scenes from her childhood, the author discloses very little about Lillian. Why do you think she did this? How would the book be different if we knew more about Lillian’s day-to-day life?
I really don't know, except that Lillian is kind of like the "magic fairy godmother" in the book...the mysterious seer....the waver of magic wand (in this case the magic spoon). the book really centers on how the author sees the participants in the cooking class growing and changing, not how Lillian grows and changes.
4) As a general rule, Lillian doesn’t give her students recipes. Why do you think she does this? What are the pros and cons of this approach to cooking?
hmmm. when you are comfortable cooking without a recipe, I believe you are less afraid of cooking and perhaps more creative. perhaps the food reflects you more than others. however, i find it a bizarre way to teach newbies. I always start with a known recipe and then create from there, deviate however I feel comfortable. I think the author was more interested in making a point than describing how most cooking classes are taught. I've taken many, never had one without a recipe.
5) Did Helen do the right thing by telling Carl about her affair? How would their marriage — and Helen and Carl themselves — have evolved had he never learned the truth?
I don't think she should have told him. It hurt him without changing anything. She was staying with Carl and loved him. She would have to learn how to live with the memories of the lover and say goodbye to all that. She had to do that her own way anyhow. I think it would have been easier if he hadn't known.
6) Each of the character’s stories centers on a dish or ingredient which has a profound affect upon how they see themselves or the world. What connections do you see between Claire and the crabs? Between Chloe and tortillas? Tom and the pasta sauce?
I hadn't really thought about that until now...but I guess I should have...they are the ultimate metaphors.
7) Although we only see Charlie, Tom’s wife, in flashback, she seems to share Lillian’s love of essential ingredients. What do you make of Charlie’s statement that “We are all just ingredients. What matters is the grace with which you cook the meal”?
I'm not sure I get it frankly.
8) Chloe observes that Thanksgiving at her house is “about everyone being the same and if you’re not, eating enough so you won’t notice.” Is this something that our culture buys into in a larger sense? How does Lillian’s approach to food fly in the face of this idea?
One of the things that I did love about the book was how Lillian encourage everyone to slow down and savor flavors and ingredients. She tried to encourage them essentially that "more is not alway better". She attempted them to wakeup to the best tastes (like the ugly tomato). I thought this was a good message and always made me hungry.
9) Isaac says to Isabelle that he thinks “we are each a ladder and a chair for the other.” What do you think he means? Are there people in your life who are or have been that for you?
I forget in what context this was said...so I'm afraid I don't understand it and don't really want to make the effort to go figure it out.
0) Lillian tells the class that “A holiday is a lot like a kitchen. What’s important is what comes out of it.” In what way do the kitchens in this book — Lillian’s childhood kitchen, the greasy spoon where Tom meets Charlie, the kitchen that Antonia saves from demolition — represent different celebrations of life? Is there a kitchen in your life that you associate with a particular celebration or emotional milestone?
Not sure. And no.
11) At the end of the novel, Lillian reflects that: “She saw how connected [the students’] lives had become and would remain. Where did a teacher fit in the picture, she wondered, when there was no longer a class?” What do you think happens to Lillian once her class is disbanded? What do you imagine happens in to the other characters’ lives after the book ends?
Again..I think the extent to which the students "connected" and became intimate with one another is simply unrealistic and I have trouble extending those relationships into the future. To have had one or two connect in that way is possible. to have had it happen in a class that met for a long time, possibly. But again...this just didn't work for me. Lillian will move onto the next class...and in the authors world I'm sure she will weave the same "magic" onto the next class of people. I believe the author would like us to believe that everyone will live happily ever after since in the end I believe she wrote a fairy tale.
12) What would be your essential ingredients?
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