Keri's thoughts

I didn't really like the questions in the back of the book, so I thought we can just talk about what we liked, didn't like, etc. this time. But if anyone wants to bring up some specific questions, we can do that too.

I really enjoyed the book. I wish there had been pictures of their homes, or scenic places mentioned or of their family. I didn't mind that the book didn't really keep a specific timeline and just meandered through their time in France from chapter to chapter.

In the chapter "French Skin" I was particularly fascinated by her observation about how French women are "more comfortable in their skin." In some ways I can see that the ease at which nudity was portrayed in every aspect of their lives might be annoying, frustrating, or bothersome it also became a way for them to see the acceptance was for every body type and not just the perfect ideals of America. "There was a statue in a rose garden downtown that became one of our favorites. It was a woman - a real woman - with thick thighs and round breasts. She stood facing a fountain, as if under the shower, holding back her long hair to let the water rinse through it. 'I like that girl', Sarah told me on a walk. It made me happy. I was sure that when we moved back home she might lose her fantastic accent, and she'd probably forget a lot of the words that once flowed so easily, but I hoped she'd always stand tall like that stone woman in the park, at peace with the skin God gave her."

In the chapter "Blessed Mary" I enjoyed how Rebecca became entranced by Mary. I would imagine that being in Europe and surrounded by so much religious iconography one would become intrigued by it. I can understand her wariness of having a Mary statue on display in her home, but felt that she handled it in a way I could agree with. She wasn't worshipping her Mary statue, but appreciating it's presence in her home and the peace that she could get from observing it. "I loved looking at my Mary, though I still gave all my prayers to the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. She stood there beside the pink delphiniums, a beautiful symbol of that it meant to be a servant, reminding me of our universal need to connect with what is holy, and bringing forth a prayer to my mind... (Lord's prayer in French)."

The chapter "11 Septembre" was also very meaningful. Beginning the book I didn't realize that they had been living in France in 2001, but it was interesting to read about how they found out, how their French friends and acquaintances reacted, and especially how their children handled it - Benjamin in particular. His very realistic and frightening dreams must have been so terrible to handle night after night, especially knowing there was nothing that they could do to help him. "Dreams...They tell the truth. His world is broken and it will never be the same. No one can fix it - that is the saddest part. Perhaps we don't properly appreciate how deeply children take in their environment, and how sensitive they are to the pain in the world...Perhaps I might need to reevaluate my theory - it appears that children are deep thinkers only some of the time. But I'm glad to do what I can. The pain of a finger I can handle - the pain of the world is another story."

One of my favorite characters in the book was Madame Mallet. I loved how attached she became to the the comings and goings and everything in between of the Ramsey's life in France. Though I am certain that had I myself had to deal with her I would not have handled it well...she made for a very interesting reading and I always looked forward to stories about her and what she had to say. I think she was a lonely woman who wanted or perhaps needed something to occupy her life...and the Ramsey's became her focus. She mothered them, disagreed with them, angered them, flattered them, and most of all loved them. "Don't you see? Henry said. You are such a close friend to her that she can be rude to you. You've made it. French people are only rude like that to their closest and dearest friends."
"Monsieur Mallet and I are holding on to life like crumbling fortresses. But we look forward to the day when you drive down our street for a visit and park in front of our gate, like you used to do before I instructed you to do it the proper way. You're so dear to us and we'll always love you, no matter what the crazy Roches say...We miss all of you, Affectionately, Astrid."

In the chapter "A Home for the Greatest Show on Earth" I loved the description of Rebecca's friend Madame de Thiolas' home - full of things which did not match yet went together anyways. This is what I aim for my own home to be like, though I probably tend more on the side of crazy, cozy clutter rather than Parisian elegance. :) But, I wholeheartedly agree with Madame de Thiolas when she says: "I suppose it is the French way to surround oneself with the things one loves...(then describing a visit to a home in Connecticut)...it was too perfect for my taste - too stiff, too sterile. Everything matched...That would stifle me - to lock myself into such a formula. I didn't understand it. What if you found something you loved but it didn't fit? What are you supposed to do - abandon it? No, I couldn't live like that." Even though it would never be my taste to decorate with a giant circus poster like Rebecca fell in love with...I love the idea of embracing what you love and surrounding yourself with objects, art, books, etc that make you happy...even if they don't match. What they have in common is that you love them.

All in all I truly enjoyed this book and hope that I someday have the opportunity to visit France for myself and experience the beauty, the history, the elegance, especially the food...and even the bird poo!